Dear Laura Kate and Shepherd,

Listen to your mommy and head her advice:

It does not bode well to crawl under the chairs at the kitchen table. You get stuck every time because your heads are larger than the space between the cross bar and the floor. If I had a dollar for every time I unstuck you I might have enough to pay for your first week of college. But seeing as how no one is paying mommy to wiggle your little bodies out 50 times a day, and also seeing as how very soon I may be too large to crawl under the table and rescue your squaking, flailing, bodies, I would really appreciate it if you just didn't get stuck in the first place, mkay?

Love,
Your Second Favorite Person In The World